I listened to the zinc roof sing above my head as the heat poured down on it. I must have been crazy for coming here but I felt I just had to. It was two months since I had heard the news, and two days since I had been in this new, wild country with not even the slightest resemblance of home. Somehow, I knew I had done the right thing in coming and a calm settled over me as I thought more about it. I was to stay for as long as I could until I found all that I was looking for, until I had gotten all the answers I needed or at least until I had seen with my own eyes that which I had been imagining my entire adult life.
I lay in bed for the few hours left in the day; I could feel when the sun was about to set and heard from the change in the noises outside that the others were preparing for bed. I smiled under the sheets as my mind once again went on another journey to far away places where no one could harm me. I smiled so hard I thought it would stain the sheet and I burst out laughing at the thought. I couldn’t help it; it was a great relief to be alive and laughing again.
I must have slept that night with a smile on my face for I awoke the next morning to a smiling sun. I allowed him to kiss my forehead as I slipped on my shoes and got ready for the most important meeting of my life… when mother and child would be- finally re-united. That thought had me smiling some more and I laughed so hard that tears ran down my cheeks. The woman that came to get me thought I was in pain and tried to soothe me but I couldn’t explain to her the joy I had inside of being able to finally see my child, my boy! I could only laugh as she told me he was waiting with innocent eyes until the moment he would see me and start to make memories of me- his mommy. I could not contain it anymore and I screamed and the screaming turned into smiling and the smiling to laughter. There were startled and concerned faces all around as we drove to the orphanage. I couldn’t help but smile for I knew they must think I’m mad. That got me laughing again for I had thought the same thing earlier. I clutched my hand to my chest and walked in behind the skinny woman in front of me. I listened with my ears and my heart… then I looked up- straight into the eyes of my love.