Please Hear What I’m Not Saying

I Dont Want To Talk About It

passin-the-time-joel-bedfordDon’t be fooled by me.
Don’t be fooled by the face I wear
for I wear a mask, a thousand masks,
masks that I’m afraid to take off,
and none of them is me.

Pretending is an art that’s second nature with me,
but don’t be fooled,
for God’s sake don’t be fooled.
I give you the impression that I’m secure,
that all is sunny and unruffled with me, within as well
as without,
that confidence is my name and coolness my game,
that the water’s calm and I’m in command                                                           and that I need no one,
but don’t believe me.

img_03831My surface may seem smooth but my surface is my mask,
ever-varying and ever-concealing.
Beneath lies no complacence.
Beneath lies confusion, and fear, and aloneness.
But I hide this.  I don’t want anybody to know it.
I panic at the thought of my weakness exposed.
That’s why I frantically…

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